Journal 4: Just Like Iñigo

Reading through the module about Ignatian Spirituality and reviewing the film on the life of St. Ignatius brought back a lot of memories of my high school years at the Ateneo de Naga. I recalled how I fell in love with how the Jesuits took care of us and dealt with different societal issues. It was the Ateneo community, in the leadership of the Jesuits, who made me feel that my existence as a member of the LGBTQ+ community is valid. Thus, it was at the Ateneo de Naga where I found more meaning in my life. This came with understanding and appreciating the necessity to transcend our egocentric drives and reflect on the existing realities outside the institution. This pushed me to embody a life that opposes social injustices and the corruption of human dignity and a life centered on service to the marginalized. This inspired me to be vocal about political issues and to understand the hardships of the underprivileged not by mere assumptions but by actual interactions and conversations with them. Being true to the oath of a life of contemplative faith that ultimately leads to active service and being a person for and with others, I also endeavored to participate in and spearhead a number of Ignatiana and Xavier outreach activities. It’s just beautiful. My life seemed to have become “enlightened”.

Pondering on my “coming of age” story at the Ateneo, I then became really interested in knowing the roots of the progressive congregation behind it that is the Society of Jesus. In ninth and eleventh grade, we watched the film “Ignacio de Loyola” and learned a lot about the boy that is Iñigo. From the film, I was able to relate with Ignatius in a lot of aspects but the most significant point of comparison for me is how mischievous and adventurous Iñigo was. Like him, I have been exploring a lot of things in terms of fields of interest and romantic affiliations where I tend to forget the place of God in my life, especially that our generation is now open to a lot of things that may have been considered taboo before. Like Iñigo, I have been sinful. While I may have been doing things for others, a veiled part of this story is my tendency to overlook my source of goodness which is God. But then, having been inspired by Ignatius’ story of conversion, I continue to believe that I can learn to become a better version of myself every day.

Overall, I gained a lot of learning from the film. I realized that there truly are “plot twists” or turning points that could really change the route of the rest of a person’s life. These moments may be painful but it is best to cherish the fact that pain would not have the last word. There will be more life than just pain after such moments. Moreover, the film reminded me that despite one’s sinfulness, one can truly do great things, especially those that glorify God’s kingdom. Being sinful does not mean one is not capable of doing good anymore. There truly is goodness in everybody that awaits being lived out. Thus, it is wrong to judge people for their shortcomings, define them as just that, and “cancel” them in society. Indeed, all of us can just be like Iñigo. We can change for the good. Furthermore, I can’t help but recall the line “We are men of Loyola, we never look down.” While others find this inspiring, I honestly feel that this is not fully applicable in our reality now. We can look down sometimes; there’s nothing wrong with that and it truly is just part of life. Perhaps, the line just reminds us to look back up after looking down and strive to move forward as there is more to explore in our earthly journey.